Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Shelly's Response: Communication and Trust

Good communication is one of the keys to real intimacy in a relationship. You've heard the expression, "I'm not a mind reader!" Well this definitely holds true when it comes to communication. If you can't express what's on your mind, how will your partner know what is going on in there??? Communication is an ongoing process that requires alot of time and effort on the part of both people in the relationship. "Please pass the salt" will only get you so far in the intimacy department. Making a conscious effort to deepen communication can only bring the relationship to higher levels.

Lauren wrote about arguing/debating. My feeling about that is that it totally depends on the personalities of the people doing the arguing/debating. For example, Lauren looooves to debate. Some may even call it arguing. She gets heated. She gets loud. She even gets exasperated! But when her piece is said, she feels better. Like she has been heard. Me, on the other hand, I get uncomfortable with that type of communication. I prefer to keep the discussion low key and in the moderate range. If voices get raised I am ready to end the discussion. But Lauren does bring up a good point that if you are careful not to go on the attack, if you are respectful of the other person's opinion, then the approach may work. Just make sure you both are on the same page!

Trust.....ahhhhh. The very foundation of a successful relationship. When I first read this post by Lauren, this was the subject I was drawn to. I was impressed with her insight of how if you can't trust your partner then you are not able to go on and live your life outside of that relationship. You are always on edge, wondering if that person is "doing something shady". That is spot on......

Sadly, trust can be broken and is unfortunately one of the hardest elements to repair in a relationship. Time does have a way of healing past hurts, but unless both parties are willing to work hard to get past it, the concept of trust being critical is perfectly illustrated.

Communication and trust..... Lauren does know a thing or two about this relationship stuff!!

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